Updated: Apr 21
Did you know that some abusive people punish their partner for falling asleep, and then punish you for making mistakes when you are exhausted!
Sleep deprivation is a particularly sinister and deceptive abuse tactic because sleep is vital to our survival, just like food and water.
Here are some examples of how an abuser will keep their partner awake:
Baiting you closer to bedtime to get you worked up
Needing "help" with something, just as you are going to bed.
Loud crashing, banging, stomping or music
Looking for something they have “lost”
Turning lights on and off
Not allowing you to go to bed
Punishing you for sleeping
Starting circular arguments at a late hour
Waking you up in the middle of the night demanding sex
Prodding and poking you to stop you from sleeping, until you have agreed to their demands
Being deprived of sleep can have dangerous emotional and physical effects, including adrenal fatigue, depression and anxiety, feeling run down, being accident prone, forgetfulness, impaired judgement and even heart disease.
According to Healthline, long-term effects of sleep deprivation can include:
Trouble thinking and concentrating, including problem-solving
Memory issues, such an inability to remember new information
Weakened immune system that can result in you getting sick more often
An increased risk for high blood pressure
An increased risk for accidents
Weight gain—the chemicals that tell your brain you’re full are compromised, resulting in an inclination to overeat
Poor balance and coordination
Increased risk of heart disease
Sleep deprivation is also inflicted during the ‘love bombing’ phase. Their constant communication by text and calls starting, first thing in the morning, throughout the day, all evening and late into the night are designed to condition you into accepting this negative behavior.
Narcissists use sleep deprivation to control you, it’s all part of the manipulation, gaslighting and mind-games which are part of an abusive relationship.
When you are sleep deprived your brain pattern alters and you enter a “FOG” like state. Reasoning and clarity of thought is diminished. That is where they do their damage. It is a form of torture that is used to break and control you.
This is not you feeling crazy or out of control for no reason, they do this on purpose. Did you know that the U.S.S.R (the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics) which broke up in 1992 into Russia, had a torture technique that left no marks, it was called "The Conveyor". This technique disrupted a person’s sleep, and this disruption was kept up until they cracked. The longest anyone lasted was 31 days.
Have you experienced this? I know I did. If you recognise that this is what your partner is doing and you need help identifying the other tactics of a narcissist, why don’t you book in for a FREE call with me, click here to schedule your call, or find out more about my online video coaching services.